Kindness

“You’re too nice.” I’ve heard these exact words more than once and I know some of the time it’s been meant as an insult. I have to ask, what’s wrong with being nice? What’s wrong with being kind? What world are we living in that being kind and caring is so off-putting? What’s happened to the Golden Rule? To save you google aficionados: treat others how you want to be treated. This was something that was instilled in me from a young age, and didn’t really start to hit home with me until I’ve gotten older. Now don’t get me wrong, I’ve had a mean streak in the past and I do my best to keep it in check now-a-days. I feel remorse for how I’ve treated some people earlier in my life, and not heeding my own advice I’m currently advocating.

Since I was a small child, I was always an easy target to pick on. It may have been harmless things like tickling or joking about the size of my ears or nose. Those seemingly innocuous remarks or actions made me to feel insecure and my voice had no significance. You might be asking how that made me feel like my voice didn’t matter. Picture a small child getting tickled and telling the tickler to stop but they do not. Little by little when things like that keep happening you get conditioned to believing that your voice is irrelevant. Which is far from the truth. Each individual reading this should use their voice to their fullest extent. Major fast forward to high school and I was an even easier target since I laughed most things off and pretended that they had no effect on me. High schoolers, especially now days since most things are said over a device, are ruthless. When I was in school, it was always enlightening to hear about the stories the rumor mill churned up. On the other hand, some things that were true, got turned into jokes at my expense. Fast forward again to the “adult” world, and I’ve crossed paths with numerous “adults” that are just as mean if not meaner than some high schoolers. I’ve been on both ends, I’ve been the bully as well as I’ve been the receiver of bullying. Those are stories for another day. Long story short, it’s not worth being rude to others.

Our world has gotten so far from love thy neighbor. When you see someone struggling to get an item off the top shelf at the grocery store, do you stop and help or keep walking? If a child got separated from their guardian, do you help the kiddo locate them? Do you help the older gentleman or woman cross a busy street? How about loan your neighbor a cup of sugar? Or even a hand with a house project? What do you do when you see someone on the roadside broke down? We’ve become a herd of individuals that have gotten very self-centered and are only looking out for ourselves. You might feel alone in this world as well, and that people don’t stop to help you so why should you help someone else? Be the first domino that falls, go against the norm and spread some positivity and hope into the world. All it takes is one person doing something kind, for someone else to see and want to carry that on. Be a light in the darkness. I get that it’s easier to join in on what may seem like a harmless joke about someone. You don’t know how much those actions may hurt an individual. It shouldn’t matter if they’re standing present in that conversation or not. Some of you are malevolent and don’t try and sugar coat the mean things you say or do. If roles were reversed, how would you feel someone saying rude things about you? Whether it be to your face or behind your back, neither should be voiced.

If this provokes you, do you like feeling like you’re Regina George or any of the Plastics from Mean Girls? (Or whatever movie bully reference you prefer.) You might not even realize you’re doing it, or else you do and you’re ignoring it. If you’re triggered by this you may want to take a deeper look inside of yourself and figure out why. A trigger is a reminder of what still needs to be healed. Was someone mean to you as a child? Or in high school? Let that chip on your shoulder go, and don’t be like the mean person you encountered. You can be the difference in one person’s life and you both can keeping making a difference in the world.